Rafting Owens River with Toy Paddles

 

We got up that morning to pee in the nearby rocky hills. Debbie and I had slept in my SUV where it was warm and dry. We were glad to get back into our sleeping bags to warm up again. We had been traveling and adventuring for the past five days and that Tuesday was our last full day before going home. Steve was sleeping a few yards away from the car. Unknown to us, he picked up all our bags we had thrown on the ground to make room in the car and put them inside his tent, to protect them from the rain, a storm that had caught us by surprise.

I wanted to go back to sleep as it was still dark, but dawn was approaching and we couldn’t resist watching the sunrise from the back windows of the SUV. We started chatting about our trip, at times laughing out loud as we remembered the crazy stuff we had done. We discussed the sad state of our personal belongings as we thought they would be soaking wet. Neither one of us wanted to get out and check. Below our hill a few people were gathering in the pools of the hot springs already. I wondered who in the world would get up that early just to experience some hot water in a smelly pool.

Steve joined us as the sun came up and told us of his kindness. As usual, the planning of what we would do that day would come sometime during breakfast. It was a trip planned on the spur of the moment, looking around where we were and finding something to do. Steve was in charge of the logistics. He knew the area like the back of his hand.

Breakfast had been very early every day, usually at around 6AM or even earlier. It was not planned, it just happened that way as we got up with the sun every day. Steve was the first one up; he usually went for a hike somewhere and disappeared for a while. The campground was definitely primitive, there was no water or facilities and the only sign that we could camp there was a rustic and crumbling fire pit under a huge rock.

It occurred to me that I desperately wanted a Chai Tea Latte from Starbucks. Debbie agreed and as soon as we told Steve, he was on the driver’s seat taking us to Mammoth Village to a coffee shop he was familiar with. I didn’t even get out of my sleeping bag and the rocking motion of the car on the dirt road put me back to sleep. I don’t know how long it took to get there, I only remember the car moving on asphalt and it was time to get out. Steve asked me if I was going in with my thermal underwear I had bought sometime ago in Canada. He suggested I put pants on as the bright stripes of my underwear might startle some people.

I agreed, although I was perfectly willing to go inside the coffee shop showing off my bright pants and top, he also gave me his jacket and I found a scarf somewhere. I looked decent for a change. The last five days had been filled with adventures, sleeping on the ground, under a tent and Debbie had even slept on top of a picnic table just to admire the stars over the dessert. I was yet to do that, I preferred the seclusion of my tent; my own personal space where I could be alone.

While drinking coffee and eating some delicious bread Steve bought, we planned the day. I remembered I brought my inflatable raft which had been carted around on top of my car for 5 days. The paddles were hidden behind the back seats. We decided to find out the status of the Owens River at the office of the Bureau of Land Management. Barbara, the Ranger, said it was a great river for floating as it was calm and rapids were few and not more than class II. That suited me fine since I’d never guided a raft before, I could probably manage to stay in the water and float, which was the purpose of my raft.

After cleaning up as much as we could in the bathrooms available at the coffee shop and BLM, (Steve and Debbie actually washed their hair on the bathroom sink) we headed to the entrance of a long gravel road that led to a campground where we could inflate the raft and put it in the river. I looked at the small rapids ahead and thought I could handle them, if they didn’t get any worse than that, the trip down a couple of miles where Steve would pick us up would be a pleasant one and fun in the sun. Debbie and I loaded up on sun block; I wore my bathing suit with a t-shirt on top and stuck my Teva Sandals in the fold of the raft to keep my balance. Steve said not to do that as I could hurt my foot if a rock hit the bottom of the raft, but from experience, I knew I could not fall into the water as long as my foot was firmly inside that fold.

Steve said he would shadow us and drive my SUV down the road a bit and meet us down the river, near the bridge, to see how we were doing. It seemed simple enough and fun. We knew if we got in trouble, there would be plenty of fishermen down the river to help, per Barbara’s advice. Debbie had only one experience rafting in Costa Rica in very warm water. I have been in many rafting trips in Canada, Colorado River, Costa Rica and felt confident enough to know what I was doing. Just keep paddling as hard as I could, stay away from big rocks and try to keep the raft in the middle of the river.

The Fun Starts

The first rapids were fun; we cheered and gave each other high fives for making it without falling or capsizing the raft. I got more confident after the small rapids. The problem was when we picked up momentum and the current took us faster down the river. I tried desperately to maneuver the raft in the middle of the river and at the first bend I lost control and we headed toward the shore. The tall reeds stopped us, laughing, we continued, this time to the other shore. We were zigzagging too much but we were just having fun.

At the next bend I tried hard to keep the raft in the middle again, but it was impossible, when we hit the shore a bunch of dead tree branches stopped us, I wondered just how sharp those branches were and just how sturdy was the plastic of the raft. We continued, laughing harder. I told Debbie to paddle on the same side I was and she kneeled on the raft facing forward for more control. The raft took off faster down the river, there was no way I could slow it down, the current was moving swiftly picking up speed in the long stretches and slowing down at the bends. Unfortunately, at every bend, our raft ended up on the shore. Since I’m heavier than Debbie, the raft tended to slam on the shore on my end. I got annoyed after the first couple of slams on the trees and tried even harder to keep control of the raft.

As we moved down the river and we knew we would slam on the trees we tried desperately to keep control, to no avail, at every bend the raft found itself on the shore and the trees kept getting sharper and longer than before. The reeds were around but they seemed to disappear when we came around the bend, instead we managed to find every dead tree and slam into it, with me taking the blunt of the hit first. Debbie thought this to be very funny and she would bend over the raft and laugh her head off whenever she turned around and saw me trying to untangle myself from a tree.

The worst was when a tall tree with many dead branches I could not avoid caught me head on and if I hadn’t had my foot firmly on the raft, I would have ended up in the water. Instead, my hat was tangled up on a branch, many branches poked me everywhere, my paddle was behind me hanging from my hand and I looked like I had lost a battle with a tree. I had! The raft was stopped finally and I proceeded to recover my body from the tree. Debbie said she had to pee in her pants from the laughter. I couldn’t help it but laugh also, although it was painful and humiliating. By now I had many scratches on my arms and legs and was ready to call it quits.

When we came around yet another bend we saw fishermen, the first ones of the trip. We told each other we needed to look good for them so they wouldn’t laugh at us. We paddled desperately and tried to look good but this time a tree in the middle of the stream caught us, we couldn’t even paddle around it. Slam we went into it full force. We just laughed. Upon watching us, the fisherman said: “You guys are dangerous.”

Mind you, we were dangerous, not that we were in danger. I wonder to whom? The fish? The fishermen? The River? What had he meant?

We continued and as we left his view I yelled: “Where is the bridge?” he looked at me thoroughly confused and said: “What bridge?” I shuddered at his answer. There was no bridge? Where would we meet Steve?

By now I was really annoyed at the meandering river. I began to scream for us to paddle as hard as we could so we could stay somewhat away from the shore and the needles of the dead trees way before I saw their danger. Yet no matter how hard we paddled, the boat managed to just spin and somehow end up on the shore. I would just close my eyes, protect as much of my body as I could and make sure that foot was firmly embedded in the fold of the boat so I wouldn’t fall.

I was done with this adventure; I began to pray to see Steve soon so he would take my place. When I saw him in the distance waving frantically at us, as if we couldn’t see him or there were many boats on the river, I was relieved. Somehow we made it to a shore where he could jump into the boat and I could jump out. There was no asking, I just demanded he take my place. Debbie did not want to quit her experience; she was having too much fun.

I delegated my puny paddle that Steve called a kid’s toy and told them I would meet them down the river. I was relieved to be out of the water, so relieved that suddenly all the tension in my body left me. I was safe on land, thank God!

I drove the car a few miles down river and found a nice beach where they could pull in and we could take the boat out of the water. I felt that was enough adventuring for the day and they would be exhausted. Steve was more experienced at paddling and I was sure the two of them were having fun. The sun and the breeze of the afternoon were soothing and I needed to be alone and calm my nerves for a while. I brought my book, wore my hat and sat down to wait.

60 pages into my very interesting book I looked up at my watch. It was 5PM. I had been at the beach for two hours. I immediately panicked, where were they? What happened? My mind began to race and I came up with a myriad of outcomes, some very sobering but most absolutely harrowing.

Panic in the River

I calmed myself down and moved into action. I had to find the bridge, I had no idea if it was ahead or behind me so I got in the car and headed as fast as I could back to where we started. I stopped another car on the road and asked if he had seen a couple of rafters with an inflatable boat, he said no. My mind continued to race at the prospect of something really bad happening to them. I sped on the dirt road back and suddenly it dawned on me they had my cell phone in a dry bag attached to the boat. Debbie’s cell phone was dead and Steve didn’t have one. Our thoughts were that them having the cell phone in case of an emergency was a better idea.

I was desperate to find any fishermen in the area to borrow their phone. I finally saw one fishing off a bridge and I was positive he knew where they were. Instead, the man was rude, saying he didn’t have a cell phone, he came there to fish and he hadn’t seen anyone. I swore under my breath at his insensitivity… MEN!

I continued driving back to where we had launched the boat. Why was it taking me so long? Had we really advanced in the river that much of a distance? This river meandered like crazy I remembered, how could this area be so isolated? My prayers were not answered. I saw cars parked on the side of the road, but not one soul around. Where had everyone gone? Are fishermen such isolated people? Finally I saw two getting into their cars. Speeding as if they were running away from me I slammed on the brakes near them and sent plumes of dust and smoke all over the area.

When it finally cleared two very annoyed fishermen were staring at me wondering what in the world I was doing. I tried to explain without sounding too frantic that I had lost two of my friends in the river and I needed to use their cell phone to call them. One older man shook his head, pulled his phone and asked me what number to dial. I assumed he thought I was too deranged to actually be able to use his phone, which I appreciated. He handed me the phone and I heard it ring.

Once, twice, three times. My God! What had happened? Finally Steve answered. I have never been so relieved in my life. They were alive and I didn’t have to drive home alone to notify their families of a tragedy. Steve told me where they were, but I had no idea where that was because I had an even less idea of where I was. The older fisherman took pity on me and took the phone. He spoke briefly with Steve and then turned to me. He spoke slowly and deliberate, and right there I knew I hadn’t handled this situation calmly. He told me exactly where to go and asked me to repeat what he had said. Good communication skills. I was thankful.

I drove back toward the highway like a bat out of hell. I even passed another car I thought was driving too slowly. The dust and dirt rose up hundreds of feet into the air and I could not see anything in my rear view mirror. Finally in the distance I saw two bodies moving on the highway, one was wearing a light green top and the other a man’s plaid shirt.

The Adventures Continue

I felt like jumping out of the car and embracing them. Debbie was too serious, as if a terrible emergency had happened and she didn’t want to give me the bad news. I could not imagine how bad it was, they seemed healthy and in one piece, right there in front of me, how bad could anything else be?

They told me how she had fallen out of the boat, not once, but twice when Steve delegated the reins of the boat. The water was freezing and she was soaking wet. As the afternoon wore on and neither had dry clothes they switched. Debbie was now wearing Steve’s plaid shirt and Steve looked a bit funny wearing Debbie’s light green, long sleeve blouse. On top of that, his cotton pants were wet on the crotch and he had a paddle on his hand. Was he also wearing lipstick? Where was the boat? I wondered.

They had decided to pull the boat out of the water way before they reached me. They were tired and soaked and since neither could control the boat, they had meandered from one shore to the next banging the boat on each shore just as I had done. They, however, had gotten smarter, and dove to the bottom of the boat so as to not get hurt by the dead branches. Why hadn’t I thought of that? I didn’t want to laugh at the picture but inside I was dying to bend over laughing.

Steve said his lips were burning and Debbie offered her colored lip balm. His only answer was: “What color is it” To which she just burst out laughing. What did it matter? He needed the lip balm desperately.

Looking like a pair of crazy people, they had gotten a ride from the pull-out point from a woman with lots of room in the back of her truck. She took them to the main highway. They were so busy chatting with her telling of their adventures that neither noticed my red SUV parked a few yards from the main road where I was waiting for them. They totally bypassed me and of course, busy as I was reading my book, I never saw them.

The story continued. All their possessions were in my car, they had no wallet, no phone numbers, no dry clothes, Steve looked like a transvestite from West Hollywood and Debbie’s small frame was rapidly deteriorating into hypothermia. They had flattened the boat and hid it under some bushes. They thought if I never found them, they needed to survive somehow. Some of their solutions were:

Steve knew his credit card number, they would go use it at a nearby casino, win some money and go home.

They would hitch a ride to the casino, win more money, buy a Cadillac and go home.

They would hitch a ride to Mammoth, where Debbie’s friends owned a condo and they could stay there. Mammoth was a good 200 miles away, and it was getting dark already.

They would wrap themselves in the boat like a burrito and spend the night that way. At least they would be warm.

Their concern was that we had met a mere 6 days before in a meet-up group and neither knew me from Adam. Who was I after all? they worried. Yet with every solution they could only laugh hysterically as if they were two drunks holding toy paddles.

Finally, when they saw the plume of dust being left by a speeding car they knew that was me, and they were relieved. I wasn’t the least worried about the boat, it could be replaced in a second, and my relief was seeing them alive and well and on top of that, laughing their heads off.

The Final Story

We headed for the last campground of the night after stuffing the boat in the back of the car. Everything was soaking wet, dirty and muddy, but we didn’t care. We were going home the next day.

That night, over the fire and a delicious meal prepared by Debbie of rice, Indian food and a perfect salad, we recounted our adventures of the day. I took out my tape recorder so I wouldn’t miss one event and as we recollected our day, telling each other what we had done in between bouts of laughter we missed a truck that went by our campground.

A very angry campground host screeched in front and surprised us. We had been drinking wine and the fire roared in the pit. What was up with this guy?

“Don’t you know how windy it is? Can’t you see that a spark can take the whole dessert into flames in a minute? How dare you build a fire in this weather?”

I had no idea what this guy was talking about. What would burn? The dessert? There’s nothing in the dessert, that’s why they call it such! I looked around for some tumble weeds and found none. The shadow of an isolated tree in the distance told me that’s what he must be talking about.

Muttering obscenities under his breath he took out a huge bucket of water from his truck and poured it on our fire. I was about ready to complain, but Steve just motioned his finger to his lips for me to be quiet. He would handle it. After a few minutes of constant complaining the host left in a huff, no one said a word, although I’m sure we were all thinking of a few things to say.

With our party shattered in a moment’s notice we decided to go to bed. Rain threatened again (did the camp host know that?) so we all piled up in the car. Steve managed to put all our gear under the car, in the front seats and under the picnic table. We had plenty of room.

As Steve and I whispered and giggled plans of future travel Debbie fell soundly asleep. The next day we went home.

Note:

At every turn in this adventure all of us wished we had a camera. For some reason all 3 of them we carried stopped working after day 2. Batteries were dead, we couldn’t find replacements and/or memory was used up.

Everything in this story is true. The real names of my trip buddies have been changed. Both Debbie and Steve came into my life as fast as they left it, but they will be forever remembered in my heart as the most fun and adventurous, and yes, even a bit crazy people I’ve ever met. May I be so lucky as to find other travel partners who can so enrich my life as did Debbie and Steve.

More adventures of this trip coming soon.

General Area Where our Adventure Took Place